Friday, July 2, 2010

The Comment

New Friend Fridays

Today is New Friend Friday again at The Girl Creative...and while that is really a fun enough post in itself I have to write about another situation because something happened yesterday that I had to speak about...

Me and Clara were busy enjoying our Orange Chicken & rice (Me the Orange Chicken & Clara the rice ;) ) when a lady at the table next to me said "Enjoy her now...when she gets older she will be a pain in your (insert explicative)."

My thought: Okay um...1) that comment was extremely out of line and 2) completely untrue and 3) Did you seriously just call my preciousss litte squishyyyy pumpkin britches clarabear an A double dollar sign!?!?!.

And while I wanted to walk up and smush my orange chicken and rice bowl all over her mean mean face I didn't (you're welcome mom...:)) I just kept thinking of Eph 4:29: "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only that which is helpful in building others up." I actually knew that if I said anything it would not in anyway be building her up so I just smiled. That type of smile that looks like Chandler Bing all awkward and fake (remember that episode with him and Monica take their engagement pictures...ahhh I miss that show!!)

Anyways..I swear though, I was SO mad! It wasn't a selfish anger (like I've written about before) or anger because something didn't go my way but it was a "Jesus flipping over taxpayer tables in the temple righteous sort of anger that flared up in me!"

No, but seriously, does not Psalm 127:3 say "Childen are a heritage from the Lord...a blessing." And I believe that!! Wholeheartedly. Does raising a child come with challenges? Absolutely. Are there going to be periods when Clara just wants to rebel? I'm sure of it. But never, in any circumstance would I ever describe her in such a horrible way.

It made me so thankful for my mom. Even though my dad went to heaven when I was little, and even though she raised me and my sister as a single mom for 14 years, I never, ever, ever heard her say anything but how thankful she was for us. Even in our most rebellious seasons. Even when I continually broke my curfew and dated people she did not think were good for me to date. Even when I continually put myself in dangerous situations that even now I cannot believe I did. She would love me..and I am so thankful for her example of unconditional love. When by worldly standards...I was acting unlovable. I remember the day she stood in my room with tears running down her face and said..."Amber I love you so much but I just don't know what to do anymore.I'm going to give you the space you need and when you are ready to receive my love I am right here."

It still breaks my heart when I think about her in that moment... so broken by my poor choices.

But she believed and took God at his word; Chidren are meant to be a blessing. So where did we go wrong?Why are people describing their blessings in such a way as the woman yesterday? Why are people aborting their blessings? Why are these blessings being abused and neglected each and every day? Why are our foster children facilities overflowing with these blessings?

I don't know the answer to this question. I wish I did. All I know is this: No matter what happens over the course of Clara's childhood and no matter how many tears I cry over her decisions I will always remember she was a gift. A gift from above; my precious blessing and I will never ever ever let her feel as though she is anything but that.

I love you sweetheart. I am so thankful for you and the ways you have blessed me and your daddy's life.


Katie's Nesting Spot said...

Seriously I can't believe that mom! What was she thinking? Guess something must have happened just a little bit ago that made her feel that way about her kids. But really to use such language and to say that to you! She must be hurting and want someone else to feel that way too. There really wasn't going to be any good coming from that comment. I can't believe you managed to hold it together and not say something back. I think I would've just been rendered speechless.

L said...

AMEN!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooo over the nasty and uncalled for comments. I just wanna say, sorry that you raised a bung hole. It's really a reflection on you now, isn't it?

I don't know if I coulda kept my mouth shut.....way to go. :)

I am Harriet said...

Stopping by from new friend Friday to say hello.
Have a good Friday!

katlupe said...

I am here from New Friend Friday! I remember giving my parents some grief too when I was younger. I guess it comes with the growing up agenda.

Lori@live~laugh~love~create said...

Wow! I can't believe some people! Thanks for following me. I am following back.


Theresa said...

Hi Amber Dawn. Thanks for stopping by my blog from NFF. I am following you back. I would love to chat about homeschooling, feel free to email me anytime.

mama brehm said...

Wow... I can't believe that a stranger said that ... people are strange, aren't they? Hopefully she was just having an off day.

Reading the story about your mom, Amber... I never knew you to be a crazy girl but because you had those experiences, you will be a better momma to Clara.

I would find that lady and buy her lunch. She obviously needs something more in her life:).

dustinnikki said...

Hi! Following from Friendly Friday!

Have a great weekend!

Heather said...

It amazes me what some people will say especially considering her opinion was unsolicited. I'm very impressed you were able to hold it together. I don't know if I could have done the same.

Thanks for checking out my blog and becoming a new follower. I look forward to following your blog.

Creations By Cindy said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. You are sweetie. Happy 4th of July! Be blessed. Cindy

Karla @ Ramblin' Roads said...

You just keep believing in your little sweetie! Parents of teens told me similar things when my girls were little and I refused to believe them. Guess what? My daughters are now 17 and going-on-15 and they are absolutely DELIGHTFUL!! I still enjoy them just as much every day as I did when they were babies!

Taylor @ The Undomestic Momma said...

some people are just crazy!!!

Mari said...

Um yeah! That comment was completely out of line some people can be so so rude!! And YAY for Jess lovers, she's an awesome person!

Mrs. Mommy said...


I am following back from the Friday Follow! I love the look of your blog and can't wait to read more!

Crystal said...

It gets me even more when it is a stranger who thinks it's ok to say these thing.
New follower from FF
Enjoy your weekend

ele said...

Hi Amber!

Just wanted to say hello after I read your comment:-)

I always wonder how people come to assume that everyone feels the same way they do about certain things.

blessings from UB!

Teresa @ Grammy Girlfriend said...

She is such a cutie.
Hope you had a GREAT FOURTH!
I have a fun giveaway on my holiday blog...
check out A Baby Changes Everything
drawing Monday night

Stephanie M. Page said...

Our Babies are SO PRECIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jennifer M said...

Clara's a lucky girl and I hope if meanie had any kids that they turned out okay. You have to wonder if people like that ever think back on things they say.
By the way, thanks for letting me know that crepes weren't a hit at your house either. I thought for sure they'd love them and I was disappointed when they weren't interested in them.

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