Friday, August 27, 2010

I'm going a little deep here....but I just had to address this topic today

I'm sorry everyone. I know that it's Friday and Friday's are happy days; the weekend is near and filled with puppy's, rainbows and sunshine (jk!) but this subject has been on my heart all week and I know whenever something continues to press my heart I need to write about it.There are no pictures, no jokes, no smiley faces. Just my thoughts...on a page.

 It all started with Jenny's blog topic a couple weeks ago. Jenny is the lead singer for Addison Road. This is her blog. I would definitely encourage you to read it. It's going to pull at your heart strings but I'm so glad she put it out there.

Then it was Matthew West. He was being interviewed about his new CD. He asked others to send him their life stories and he was going to use "our" stories to inspire his album. However, what he found was that 1 in 4...I'm going to say that again ONE in FOUR girls who had written him had been abused sexually, emotionally or physically abused growing up. He said he just couldn't grasp that number. His song "broken girl" was born and as I heard it I just cried. Not for myself, thankfully... I was spared from abuse as a child, but I cried for every other girl listening who had been hurt.Ever girl I walk by on the street or at the mall who smiles but wear scars deep and hidden in her heart. Every girl (maybe even girls I know or readers who read this blog) that know this type of pain and abuse and my heart broke.

And then...then yesterday happened. This may sound creepy to do but I think (as a new mom) I want to be as informed about these things as possible. So, my friend sent me a government link a while back that allows you to track "criminals" in your neighborhood. More specifically, sex offenders. Anyone's house around your area who is a registered sex offender has a pink dot. Our neighborhood had one pink dot. And the day I found out a while ago me and D made sure to drive by..see where it's at and said we will never walk down that street. When she gets older she will never be allowed to run to friend's houses without being accompanied by me or D (which is how it should be anyways) but I figure there will be days when she will feel old enough to walk through the neighborhood without her parents but since finding this out, as long as we live here, we will walk with her. So back to yesterday, I try to check this website about once a month, just to see if anyone new has been listed. However, I found out yesterday that you can back up the "area search map" so far that you can actually see the entire area of Johnson County. And...each click backwards...made my mouth drop open. Pink dots every neighborhood...some filled with not only one but 10. Johnson County is supposedly one of the safest counties in the US and yet here I sat, a screen overwhelmed with pink dots; each signifying that someone had been abused. Because for each offender there was a victim, each pink dot a child who'd been hurt. And they live all around me...

I am positive God was really really using these three scenario's to speak to my heart. Because each situation brought the truth closer and closer to home...right into my own neighborhood. I don't know how I can help, I don't know what I can do and maybe it's just bringing awareness to this issue through this blog post. I just think each of us, should take a moment today and pray for the girls(and boys) who've been abused. Maybe a moment of silence hoping someday we will have the opportunity to encourage them in some way. Life is unfair and  people are cruel and I wish I could take all the pain and bury it deep deep inside the earth. I don't know why it happens I just know there is one person who sees it all. And while I don't understand why He allows these things to happen I think we can all sing with Carrie Underwood on this one. This is just our "temporary home" and there is a brighter hope and a brighter future that we can look forward too. God made a way for us through the cross to feel peace in knowing that we are only "here" for a little while. And in the mean time, He catches every tear that falls...

Temporary Home - Carrie Underwood

Little Boy, 6 years old
A little too used to bein' alone.
Another new mom and dad,another school,
Another house that'll never be home.
When people ask him how he likes this place...
He looks up and says, with a smile upon his face,

"This is my temporary home
It's not where I belong.
Windows and rooms that I'm passin' through.
This is just a stop, on the way to where I'm going.
I'm not afraid because I know this is my
Temporary Home."
Young mom on her own.
She needs a little help, got nowhere to go.
She's lookin' for a job, lookin' for a way out,
Because a half-way house will never be a home.
At night she whispers to her baby girl,
"Someday we'll find our place here in this world."

"This is our temporary home.
It's not where we belong.
Windows and rooms that we're passin' through.
This is just a stop, on the way to where we're going.
I'm not afraid because I know this is our
Temporary Home."

Old man, hospital bed,
The room is filled with people he loves.
And he whispers don't cry for me,
I'll see you all someday.
He looks up and says, "I can see God's face."

"This is my temporary Home
It's not where I belong.
Windows and rooms that I'm passin' through.
This was just a stop,on the way to where I'm going.
 I'm not afraid because I know... this was
My temporary home."

This is our temporary home.

*And I've shared this once before but I think it is significant to this post because of the lyrics in the song. The last verse, where she mentions the old man speaks of seeing God. Well...that happened to my father. The moment before he took his last breath my mom said he awoke from a coma like state and opened his eyes; she said he exclaimed the exact same thing and had a look on his face of complete joy, complete excitement, complete peace. He had that exact same experience Carrie sings about in that song, so I know there are people who do not believe in life after this, but my mom said, in that moment, seeing my dad's face...anyone who saw would have believed; Heaven does exist.


Mommy to Casey ♥ said...

New follower from Social Parade!

Kat said...

Doesn't a road-trip just sound like the perfect get-away??? I am hoping my boss lets me off!!

Chana said...

Hi Amber! I'm a little confused as to why these comments before me have nothing to do with your beautiful post?'s mine.
This gave me goosebumps. It was a lovely and honest post about life..the good and the bad. What hit me the hardest was that last part about your father. Amazing, something i really needed to hear (and know) and I'm so thankful he is with the Heavenly Father. Again, you have helped fuel my faith and I'm so thankful!

Andrea said...

Oh I love that song!! Really anything by Carrie is amazing! It is really frightening if you think about all the bad people out there. It is so so sad how children can't even walk to their friend's houses around the corner without the parents being afraid! Have a great day girl! ~Andrea

JoJo said...

This has always been an issue that has been hard for me to deal with especially in my professional work environment. When I was recently only a student nurse doing a rotation in the psych ward, I cried to my professor that I just couldn't listen to any sex offender without passing judgment or hatred. It was so hard for me to be unbiased. I had so much anger for the damage they caused to their innocent victims. It was torture for me to have to face people like that.
Working in the psychiatric ward is just not my forte.

JoJo said...

Oh and thanks for that website info! I'm going to look into that asap!

Melanie said...

This is a beautiful post about a very hard subject. There is another blog that I read where the mother has been talking about how finding out that her son had been sexually abused and their very Christian reaction to it. I love it when those, in the face of tragedy, can truely shine God's light in their deepest grief.

My dear friend, lost the father that sexually abused her this past Wednesday. She cried to me as she told me about laying in his hospice bed, singing songs of praise to him and telling him she forgave him. I WEPT for her on the phone and can't wait till she returns home so that I can hold her.

I will pray for each of the Pink Dots...That they each have Gods healing and protection.

[followed from Stash Mama) I follow HIM first...and hope other do too.

Ashley said...

Am, this has always been the very most difficult part of my job. Innocent children? How can people take such advantage of them? Anyway, this is a topic that isn't easy to discuss, so I'm glad you wrote this post. I miss you!

Amanda-The Nutritionist Reviews said...

Wow thats so creepy : (

I found you on Following Friday. Have a wonderful weekend!

Sheils said...

I found your post via a friend that has your blog linked on her Blog...I have just finished reading "The Shack" - its an amazing book that doesn't really have anything to do with sexual abuse, but it does have to do with a murder of a small child and the strugle the dad has and how his relationship with God evolved while trying to figure out why He would let this happen to such a small child. It was a very moving book, I cried and laughed. I recommend it if you havne't already read it. Its a book that you'll want to read all in one sitting - but it is a fairly quick read :) Thanks for this post as I have a 2 year old and am just as nervous as you are with her growing up in this scary world! Good luck to you!!!

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