Friday, November 20, 2015

A Tale of 3 Tortises

I will begin by mentioning that Clara and Dave have a different version of this story...
(I guess only Jesus knows the whole truth at this point. :))
However, I will tell my version because it's my blog. ;)
In a wonderful land by the Smithville "sea"
which some refer to as North KC,
lived a beautiful (hehe) mother of two
who had an idea, which her husband approved.
She'd start savings accounts for each of them,
that way they could save for some bigger items.
The idea made both of them glad
and this way they knew Dave Ramsey wouldn't be mad.
So, after a while Dave had an idea
he would like a 4k TV.
While Amber agreed he'd found a good deal
she kindly ;) asked he wait and made a very loving appeal.
She felt like he was rushing a decision
they'd just started saving and she thought he had listened.
But fast forward a week or so,
and she heard a loud noise from the garage, "Oh no!"
She found a mischievous team up to something,
and GENTLY suggested they stop whatever they were doing. ;)
Her sweet life partner stated they were building a city
for some tortoises he had purchased down in...Miami!?!
He'd heard of a warehouse near his hotel
that smuggled  legally brought reptiles into the US to sell.
I'm not joking when I say this you guys,
I think he was lucky to make it out of there alive.

He found some rare tortises, he felt that we needed
and while they were expensive he decided we could BREED them
So, instead of one he found TWO that he liked
a boy and a girl to bring (joy?) to our lives.
They asked if he had a large suitcase in tow,
that way he could simply "fly with them" home.
He decided against going to jail,
and asked if they'd mind sending them in the mail.

"Absolutely," they replied and we'll sweeten the offer
if you buy two, we'll include one more for twenty dollars.
Of course my sweet hubby had to accept
because he felt turning down 3 tortises was something he'd regret.
So they arrived shortly after, those three...
Rocket, Marabella and the littlest, Mr. Joey
They were kindof cute I admit
but if Dave ever hears this, I will not repeat that. ;)
Clara was in love and Corban started jumping
So apparently my family of 4 was now growing.
Some (me) would say purchasing 3 pricey turtles unwise
But Dave insists our kid's college "will now be paid for by these guys?!?"


Nevertheless, these are the three new "kiddos" in my life
Although they brought with them a bit of marital strife. (lol)
They enjoy eating lettuce and swimming in their pool
and walking around in their (Amber & Dave's bedroom) sized lagoon.


So, the moral of this story is easy to see
If your husband has been saving, just let him buy the TV!
Because as aesthetic as this huge tank may seem...

You may prefer Downton on a crystal-clear big screen!!

P.S. I know you were amazed at my wonderful rhyme scheme and syncopation - And to think this post only took me 16 minutes to write! ;)

Friday, November 13, 2015

Oh Poop

Or lack thereof...
I have been absent - and that's because the situation described above is normally not a big deal, (unless your kiddo has FPIES). Corban has been trialing foods and it has caused some stoppage of his GI tract which in the FPIES world means hospital time. He is back home and doing well but it's a journey. A non-fun, hopefully in-a-literal-sense-poopy journey.
My life right now revolves around pumping, making sure there are no crumbs within a 100 mile radius of my son, trying to adjust to life in O-town (Omaha, NE) and this beast that is controlling each moment of our life!!
(Insert mad face)
But we are trying to be strong and thankfully Clara (and her cousin Trent) are doctors. ;)
I was getting a little in over my head about all of this so I wanted to let you all know that I started a different blog called Acronym City. That is where I will write about the up's & down's of Corban's condition and can hopefully help any other families who might be struggling through FPIES. It really stinks you guys. It's really hard and it makes me cry quite a bit but I decided that walking through it alone is most likely not what Jesus would like me to do(but what I typically prefer when I'm sad) in the  hopes that others can hear our family's story and find some help and hope. I also added in POTS because that also can be no fun, but it's winter which means my autonomic system is working well and loving the cold~so don't expect any posts on that until its warm again which in NE could be in like 18 seconds but hopefully we can at least welcome Santa before it comes back!! :)
So, to sum up,
I will be back here to post fun stuff...

(Like Halloween and grandpa & grandma's)
(Life back in an 8 square foot house we had never pictured living in again with new additions including 2 doggies, 3 tortoises and 2 kiddos. Don't get me wrong, I'm so thankful God kept this home for us; just surprised to be back in it)!
(Unfortunate birthday gifts for 6 yr. olds  which include recorder's)

  (Really hard going away parties with friends and family (although I'm wearing my little-bit-crazy happy face in some of those photo's, I was just trying to be strong). ;)

(And my new songwriting co-writers "The A Team" - You can find us on...the radio) hehe
The other blog will be my more serious..
son has to take baths in hospital sinks type of thing... :(
But I promised from the beginning I would try and be "real life" over here and that is part of our world at the moment unfortunately.
So, stay tuned here for the fun and stop by Acronym City for the serious.
And as Clara and Corban would say....

Later Tator's ;)

Friday, September 11, 2015

Part Dos

So where was I?
Oh yes, telling you about "the liar" and in turn, leading to me almost chasing a stroller down the rivers of CO.
But we were rescued...
by these guys..
Haha - just kidding. Does anyone else remember what a cute movie that was!? (Sorry, I just watched "The Rescuers" with Clara and couldn't help myself). ;)
That night we all headed here...
Looks pretty innocent right? You can't really see from this angle but that is a sign for a world famous sorbet shop. You can see a tiny bit of the window in the basement...
So, why am I showing you this random picture??
Well, Dave took Clara in while I hung out with Corban because those stairs and a stroller were probably not going to be friends.
(Also, I was quite loudly proclaiming what a lovely wife and mother I was because I have given up dairy for Corbo and I wanted them to know what a valiant sacrifice I was making by not eating any with them). ;)
So, they come back up with a cup of raspberry something...
There it is. :)
Clara had eaten a few bites and finally decided to share with Dave who looked like he may die of excitement after trying some exclaiming that this sorbet may truly be the best he'd ever had! So, of course I had to try a bite myself...and then another...and then another....
At this point, guilt has completely consumed me, Clara is upset because me and Dave are eating all her sorbet and me and him keep giving eachother looks, like how can a dish of ice cream really be this delicious?!?!?
So, finally I google sorbet because I convinced myself I may die if I don't get any for myself and after reading about 3 seconds find out sorbet is actually DAIRY FREE!!!
So, at this point I'm literally sprinting into that basement shop after yelling behind my shoulder to Dave, to please make sure the kids stay alive and that "I have to get some of this dairy free amazingness!"
I get down there and tell the man at the counter (who is now changing shifts with another guy) that I'd like a kid size cup of the raspberry sorbet to which he responds, "Are you going to give this to a kid??" At this point I was a bit perturbed because I thought he was going to tell me I had to buy a regular size cup since I wasn't a child to which I was going to explain that I still had some poundage to go after having Corban, lalala and well...I decided against that because it wasn't loving and he probably didn't care and instead very eloquently said..."Errr, I plan to share some with one I suppose?!" He looks at me with a weird expression and says in a very calm manner...."Well...I wouldn't, I mean it's made of says that on the sign."
"WHERE does it say that sir and why didn't the last guy tell us that?!?!"
Okay, so now, I'm yelling that at him, as I'm sprinting back up those 50 stairs and literally yelling at the top of my lungs down the street...
I'm not kidding when it felt like the entire town turned and looked at me as Dave is grabbing the ice cream from her looking like he may have to start the process of finding a new wife....
Once, I reach them, I finally breathlessly (trying to remain as calm as I can after my moment of insanity to not scare Clara) explain that this is in fact sorbet made of alcohol. Whisky to be exact.
At this point, Clara's eyes are filling with tears and she so innocently says, "What is Allcadoll???" Literally, as she's saying this I feel that warmth start to form in my tummy realizing the horrible truth that our sweet 5 yr old may very well be drunk at this moment and that I'm feeling this stuff after 4 bites when she ate nearly an entire bowl full. So, me and Dave try as calmly as possible to collect our things and start to head back to the hotel all the while explaining to Clara that "Allcadoll" may make her feel a bit dizzy but that's all....hopefully!?!?
It was about a 20 minute walk home so we took our time hoping, to "walk off" whatever happened to be in her little system...
Shopping for Christmas bc fake snow is always fun! :)
Admiring the cute little humming bird that kept following us...
Okay, so you guessed it, I really didn't take many pictures that night hence the picture of a hummingbird but just know we did some walking lol....
And, all the while we kept hearing,
"I can't believe that ice cream had allcadoll mom and dad...but don't worry because I'm not "bizzy" at all...don't worry...not even a little bizzy. Mom, are you bizzy because I'm not bizzy at all? I really can't believe that guy did that, can you? Good thing I'm not bizzy...."
So yes, I'm afraid she was a teensey smidgen bit feeling the effects of it...and as horrible as it was, me and Dave couldn't help but shoot each other smiles back and forth as she so sweetly mispronounced alcohol AND dizzy lol.
So yes, Whisky Wednesday is now in the record books, hopefully never to be repeated but always remembered....
The rest of the nights were fairly uneventful, but you will be relieved to know Clara slept it off that night and we did not in fact give our daughter any additional sweet treats made of alcohol the rest of the trip. Parents of the year....right here.
So, I will leave you all with my favorite picture ever....
And this one....

Hehe...okay, the second one isn't my favorite but I couldn't resist being in at least one pretty fountain picture. I bet you guys didn't know I was such a beautiful ballerina. :-P
I'm sure Vail was ready for us to say good-bye by Friday but we really weren't ready to leave. I would highly recommend it for anyone that is looking for a truly relaxing vacay....(just as a side note) ;)
And....anytime your 5 yr old ends up intoxicated on your vacation there's really nowhere left to go but up so here's to "Guderian getaway 2016"!?!

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

The 9 Year Non-Itch ( Part 1)

So, just to clarify that post title...
You know how they say in marriage you get the "7 year itch?"
Well, I am happy to report that today (Sept 2nd) me and my hubby will celebrate 9 years of "non-itchiness"(for the most part, most days lol)! Hooray!! :)
(I just wanted you all to see this really awesome pic of us lol)
No, actually I wanted to show you that in honor of this special occasion we all headed our buns to Colorado! We have made a tradition out of celebrating our anniversary alone, but this year with Corban's situation it was necessary to bring the fam so that is what we did!

Who is jealous of getting to travel 2 hours on an airplane with a 6 month old?!? All of you?? ;)
My favorite part was trying to nurse him, and I'm so serious when I say this you guys...the moment Corban senses a nursing cover coming his way lately, he completely goes all "kung fu panda" on me!? It is the craziest thing, so I would like to take this moment to now formally apologize to flight 249 and anyone within a 15 seat radius of us because I'm sure you ended up seeing more than you cared to see during your flight!! EeK!!
But, we did in fact land safely and have a wonderfully fun, relaxing vacay!!
Some pics for your viewing enjoyment....
First train ride
The train ended up being an adventure itself because we were trying to make it before it closed that afternoon and the Toyota prius we rented isn't exactly a race car....however, that Monday morning I will say Dave became an amateur version of Dale Earnhardt jr and that Toyota prius gave us a very valiant (fuel economic) effort, Indy 500 style, around those steep mountain curves. ;)
And the reason for that nice glare is the fact that this is a picture of a picture, because who doesn't like to pay $20 for a picture they make you buy when you could just take your own? :-P

View outside our hotel
Okay, and I'm not trying to make you all jealous but it was seriously like, pretend looking pretty. I told God this is the view I would like from heaven. ;)

This was a little fountain area in the middle of town Clara played in each day.
 It was really fun because the weather was in the 70' most of the week, so we got to eat outside most nights...I love pics like this that capture the moments perfectly because while we all enjoyed the view... Corban was often less than thrilled. ;)

 Clara braving the "fast" rushing river in the middle of town!


(Okay so I realize you are not all her mom but it was really cute to see how proud she was of herself) :)
Fave pic ever...

Followed by the moment she almost dropped him which I also caught on camera....

Ahhh - I love those two so much I can't take it sometimes!! :)
The next day we did some hiking, which actually ended up being me, Clara and Corban being rescued by random hikers because Corban's stroller got high centered on a bridge which the tour guide said was absolutely safe for strollers...
We now refer to said tour guide as "the liar" lol

Okay, so I will leave you there in suspense as I need to watch Allegiance....
Part 2 of CO vacay coming soon! ;)

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